Happiness Project Toolbox

I ran most of a 4.3 mile run today...feeling pretty proud of myself! I am more optimistic when I exercise...

I am looking forward to "coffee time" with some fun women tonight. Women who are warm, friendly and open. Not jealous and calculating.

Going home reminded me that I'm an adult now and have my own family to look after. I do not need to be told what to like/dislike, what to eat, and how to act. I do not need to hang on to people who do not contribute to making my life better.

I'm glad I showed up for Boot Camp this morning. My butt will thank me tomorrow too.

I had a small breakthrough this afternoon. I'm starting to "get it." Wow! Very freeing...

Had awesome boot camp this morning. I feel like I can take on any challenge that comes my way today.

I'm taking small steps to improve my future...$320 this week towards the cc balances. not bad. I keep reminding myself to be gentle w/myself and to keep it real. Enough of living in my head. Time to get out and "do it."

Focusing on others really does make me feel happier. The trick is to do it without losing myself.

Ran the whole way in boot camp and felt better synergy with the group today. Even though the scale isn't budging, my fitness level has improved. Woohoo!

Finally set goals and can measure my progress. Having the life I want is attainable.

Goals are the cornerstones of a fulfilling life.

I was happier with my daily check list...makes everything not such a grind. Helps me find the good in things. Will establish new resolutions for the rest of this month.

I've continued to keep a tidy home so that I can let people in...I've been baking and cooking too. I get it now, it IS fun. Goals for 2nd half of year: conquer debt and work on building social connections.

I am making progress at fitness boot camp! Have been making observations about my eating and seeing small successes. Goals keep me focused and happy.

Accepted an invite for July 4th and enjoyed a BBQ with friends. Ran in the rain with P to catch the fireworks - a memory I will cherish!

Please don't let it rain all weekend...!!!

Holiday weekends remind me how lonely I feel. I've got to keep pushing myself to get out there.

Today I am stressed out. Trying not to blow the diet after my hard work at boot camp. It's very tempting... but where would that get me? Farther way from my fitness goal. Suck it up, stick with it. Make yourself proud.

July is going to be all about social opportunities for P and for me. We both need to learn how to get along with others. I feel badly that I've not provided strong opportunities for this development. July is the month!

I am now 42...!! Time to focus on my health...all aspects of it. I am blessed to have friends and family who care about me.

It's funny how you can find kindred spirits in the most unlikely places.

I am headed out for a night with all the ladies in our neighborhood. I'm going way out of my comfort zone for this, but am looking forward to it. Coming into it with an open, positive mind.

I am learning every day... going to be a fun, relaxed weekend. Looking forward to it. I'm taking Monday off to celebrate ME! Have made plans for my b-day.

A friend from high school is in town. She is a great role model for me. CEO of her own company, mother of 3, athletic, and a go-getter. I like her attitude. Will keep my ears open tonight at dinner to hear more of her wisdom.

Went to boot camp this morning and gave it my all. Feel a sense of accomplishment. Planning a girls night out saturday - something new for me.

I'm sweating the small stuff today which is making me anxious. An old friend is visiting in a few days and I feel pressure to have the house perfect. There is no need...she needs clean sheets, a clean towel, and good coffee. No biggie.

Week 2 of fitness boot camp...was hard this morning but I do feel a sense of accomplishment. Have been struggling with P. He needs more of our time. So thrilled for T and J who announced their pregnancy. Such good news!

Day 3 of fitness Boot Camp. 3 miles, sprints, and sit ups. It's a small group and everyone is encouraging. Funny to say (for such a brutal hour) that it is actually a feel good group. Date night tonight with J - finally a little P & Q.

Today I am hoping we'll get good news about a job for J...I'm also feeling grateful for my wonderful neighbor who shared a bounty of donated clothes from a stylish friend. Life is good. I'm reminded to keep giving to others.

Completed 2nd day of fitness boot camp. I'm feeling incredibly proud of myself. The 6 a.m. accountability is already improving my life. I've reduced my caffeine intake and eliminated the wine at night. If I can do this, I can find a better job!

One computer in the house and a demanding schedule is messing w/my happiness project...however, I'm cooking, exercising, reading and feeling pretty optimistic. Happiness is a moving target though, for sure.

A bum computer has screwed up my week a little bit. Busy though, which makes me happy. No commitments this weekend which is nice.

The exercise habit is coming back -- enjoying the feeling! Tonight is a ride around P.B. Looking forward to it.

I haven't had much "Happiness Project" internet time lately...catching up now. Working on the cooking, getting back to exercise, and reclaiming our nights. Three weeks until my b-day! Wee!

Got more cook books out at the library and have weeks worth of recipes lined up. It's a great way to channel my energy and to share with others.

Getting decent sleep lately. Feeling a little better about things. Summer break for schools starts today. Last summer before my big boy is in Kindergarten. Amazing.

I'm making a commitment to go back to the gym this month. Exercise is the healthy choice for stress relief. And actually, it's the only form of therapy I can afford :) Going back to focusing on others too. Everyone needs to know they're important.

June 1st!!! I love the first day of a new month! So many possibilities!

Hello my old friend! Have been away and have been busy catching up... My trip out west was thought provoking, happy, stressful, and monumental; to give it a few names. It's time to use the past to let go of the past...

This weekend I will make peace with the past and come back from this trip as a stronger and and more present-focused individual.

Just had a great laugh over a friend's funny photo - forgot how good it feels to genuinely laugh!! Need more moments like this!

Sleep is everything!! Couple of nights of good sleep...starting to feel almost human again. Vegas tomorrow....still so much to do...so much to do....! Looking forward to slowing down.

Two more days until trip to Vegas. So much to do... so much to do!!!

It seems someone I know has been reading my journal posts and has been disingenuous with them. I'm going private with my journal. She can go prey on someone else now...or, get a life. Either one is fine with me.

Having a fun, social weekend. Responded last minute to an invite for today -- should be a good time. More importantly, I know it's something P will enjoy and I'd feel terrible if he missed out on it.

Back to the gym today after a hiatus. Even more so than sleep, this is the key to boosting my mood.

I think what I really need is a vacation...it has been a long time. My solo trip next week will be a great time to think and to enjoy just being me; the me without all the extra hats. Some good laughs and decent rest will do me a world of good.

I think I may just be frustrated enough today to make some much needed changes...new resolutions are on the horizon...

Today, I will do at least one thing to help me get "unstuck."

My needs have been met 100% today. I'm happy and grateful for family and friends.

Book club today. A chance to participate.

I had another experience this morning that reminded me how much I need to expand my support network; no matter how uncomfortable it is...

Life continues to surprise me...an unexpected gesture of generosity has made me very happy.

Today is the first (of many) times I will take little D to his drowning prevention class. His safety is my priority and I feel good about providing him, early on, with this essential skill.

Why is it so much easier to take care of everyone else than it is to take care of myself?

Stood on top of a 10 FT ladder with P in the backyard last night to watch the fireworks downtown. Wondrous, memorable and the perfect ending to a great day.

I have rigged the environment for happiness today. Reaping the rewards...

Watching P play soccer, with such focus, determination and energy was exhilarating. To leave the game and hear him say with conviction "I am really good at soccer" gave me pride and happiness that will last for days....

New cable and internet installed yesterday...DVR here we come! No more excuses for not going to bed on time.

Nine hours of sleep and I have a whole different outlook on things...!

Lack of sleep and lack of exercise absolutely affect my happiness.

How much of my own story am I writing? What if I could write my own ending? What would it be?

I am so grateful to have a sense of humor, which is often required to overcome adversity.

I love learning new things. A tiny part of me lights up every time I think "Aha!"

I will go to this party with no expectations and have fun watching D enjoy himself.

The vision must be followed up by the venture. It is not enough to stare up the steps - we must step up the stairs. (Vance Havner - whoever he is).

I start every day by opening the blinds and letting the light in. This is actually new for me. I see it as a positive sign.

I am much happier when I am busy.

Saw bumper sticker : "Don't believe everything you think."

"Life begets life. Energy creates energy. It is by spending oneself that one becomes rich." (Sarah Bernhardt) I'm sooo not feeling it today.

"Nothing has a stronger influence psychologically...on children than the unlived life of the parent." Carl Jung -- I don't want to be that parent.

I am going to enjoy the process of cooking for friends today. I am not going to be anxious of the outcome.

Listening to podcast with Christine Carter Ph.D., author of "raising Happiness." Like what I'm hearing: Happiness is a skill that can be learned! Raising kids w/a "growth mindset" can help them feel happier and less anxious about failure.

The neighbor stopped by (unannounced) last night and I didn't have to panic about a mess or make excuses about rolling dust balls at her feet - My home was neat and presentable! Small daily efforts have paid off.

Got a call from a friend who thanked me for encouraging her through tough times. Made me happy.

A one minute e-mail to an online retailer just put $29 back in my pocket. A great reminder not to be afraid to ask for things.

This cleaning/decluttering thing....HUGE.

I realized that eating a ton of store bought crisco frosted birthday cake, just to get my money's worth, was not the way to go. Good for me.

A scheduled day off - a good day to get aligned with my goals!

Today is P's birthday. I've been a mother for five years! Hard to believe.

Went to my very first book club meeting today. Felt very at home and enjoyed the discussion. Yes, I believe I'll go back.

Funny, when one area of resolutions is going well, another starts to fall apart...like plugging leaks! Time to regroup.

Looking forward to a little "me" time tonight. Will be nice to jump off the weeknight treadmill and wander around the mall for a little bit...

There is momentum picking up with the de-cluttering and cleaning streak I've been on ... the more I do it, the more I want to do it.

Bill Cole, M.A. "The Mental Game Coach Report": It's a myth that, in a competition, great athletes focus on the goal of winning...what excellent performers focus on is the process.

I am becoming more social as I become more comfortable with myself. I will do everything I can to help my children build their confidence and ease with others at an early age.

There is a definite disconnect between my desire to be an athlete and my lack of desire to say no to the (now) abundant chocolate in this house!

Just got back from an amazing bike ride along the intercoastal with P - It took a four year old to get me back on a bike and I'm grateful he did...I feel renewed!

Ok, so the boot camp thing didn't really work out yesterday...in fact, I was more of a slacker than usual! But it's all good. Progress not perfection.

Just for fun, I will try to execute all of my resolutions "boot camp" style today. Boo-ya!

I am powerful when I play tennis.

There is nothing sweeter than holding my little boy in the early morning hours and hearing him giggle in his sleep.

It is a huge relief to allow myself to simply be me. Life changing, really.

Going to use the positive energy I gained from spin class this morning to carry me through the rest of the day. The instructor said "You are all winners today! You are here (in this class) producing -- don't let anyone tell you differently." Awesome

Book Club meeting is officially on my schedule! Now, to get and read the book...

French! I need to get back to it.

Meditation ("Re-potting Ourselves") from Sue Thoele's book: I trust my ability to heal. I nurture and protect myself when my roots are exposed. I turn my face to the sun."

I did the grown up thing and apologized. I feel immediate relief and can now move forward. What was it Gretchen spoke of recently? "When the student is ready, the teacher appears..." Um, yeah. The teacher is in my face these days.

My trip is two months from today...time to get more serious about my weight loss goal!

Meditation from Sue Thoele's book: "I am committed to being a positive thinker. I support myself by converting negative thoughts into positive ones. I deserve to have a positive and fulfilling life."

Had a great outing with the family today...being active and being in nature is a happiness formula that works for all of us.

Oh well, so much for my personal commandment "always take the high road when dealing with others." That one special person brings it out in me.

Objects In Rear View Mirror May Appear Larger Than They Are

I sabotaged myself yesterday and am still trying to figure out why... Today is a new day. Another chance to get it right.

Showed up this morning and had a good laugh with a mixed, fun group of women. Hello, why aren't you trying to do this more often?

Had a great time at the tennis clinic last night. Played well and had fun with the group. Came home and baked cookies with P who loves to help. Topped the night off doing a silly tango with P who laughed his head off...it was a good day.

oh, how the little things can brighten my day...went to the library yesterday and checked out both books I set out to find there...I'd much rather read than watch lame t.v.

J joked that I'm around the 2 mo. mark (w/this project) which is about the time I usually quit anything I've started. No, this time is different. This is for me -- not something someone else thinks I ought to be doing.

We had a great family day yesterday. It doesn't happen that often so it was a nice treat. It should be someone's birthday more often....why is it we all behave better on "special" occasions?

Work stats are out: I outperformed my male colleagues! This makes me very happy!

It is raining elephants and zebra's this morning...but there's something cozy about it...I am looking forward to our big surprise for Little D tomorrow! Making my children happy is my greatest joy in life. (Making me happy? Working on it!)

This project has brought up something I hadn't bargained for: dealing with the past. It feels contradictory (to my goals) to have been burdened with these thoughts the past few days. But, I also know, I can't truly change without this work.

Katrina Kenison's "The Gift of an Ordinary Day" is a beautiful reminder to enjoy every moment with P and D.

When I'm busy and moving purposefully through my day, I'm most content. The calendar is starting to fill up and I'm actually looking forward to things. This active involvement in my own life is a stunning revelation! Sad, but true. Keep it going B!

I am grateful to have gotten another year with a clean bill of health!

Be sure to put on your own oxygen mask before assisting others.

Got an email from T this morning. She is having a terrible struggle with Lupus and wrote the words "Take it from me, enjoy your life NOW while you can." This is a big life lesson and I guess the premise of this project - Enjoy it NOW. Thank you T.

Soccer in the backyard continued this morning. I'm loving P's enthusiasm and it makes me happy to be the one he asks to play with him.

We turned the cartoons off this morning and played soccer in the backyard. Note to self: Do this MORE OFTEN!! Good, clean fun!

I am learning every day to remain objective and non-emotional in business communication.

Against my better judgement, I stayed up until midnight watching the premiere of "Housewives NYC." (So much for the "avoid reality tv" rez!). Anyway, Ramona does a toast to the ladies: "To happiness! Without it, we have nothing!" Amen, sister!

Yes! Got email notification from the library that the book I've been waiting to read is finally on hold for ME!!

I'm wondering if I've been skirting the real issue for a very long time.

J's hours have been cut. We did not properly prepare for this. However, he can now help more around the house and help with the kids' activities. If we can stay afloat, this could actually be a good opportunity.

It's the start of a new month! Goals are set. Time to do more...to be more.

I took D to the zoo this morning. I loved seeing it through his little eyes. I stopped myself several times from trying to rush him along...there was no reason to be efficient there - we had all day! He was in the moment. A nice reminder for me.

I'm glad I made the effort yesterday to show up for the musical involving a friend's children. She was happy I came and I genuinely enjoyed the show. It reminds me of Woody Allen's quote: "90% of life is just showing up."

I cleaned the boys' rooms and gathered up all the items they no longer need/use. How great it always feels to purge stuff and to give it away to people who may need it. Good Karma, no doubt.

Not getting enough sleep has a significant impact on my happiness. Haven't been following my sleep resolution the past few days and I'm definitely backsliding. Time to make adjustments and to remember: progress not perfection.

We are dismantling the crib today! This marks a new and exciting phase for our boys. Big brother is saying goodbye to the toddler bed and little brother has earned the right to sleep in it. I'm so ready for this. No more babies for this lady! :)

Thank you to my Dad who, in dying, has taught me to live.

Instead of running errands for everyone else after work, I decided to do something just for me. The rest will just have to wait!

Thomas the Train song "Patience is a Virtue" was playing in our house this morning. Ironic as I needed the reminder. Computer access down, I.T. guys nowhere to be found, family running late, and that second pot of coffee taking too long to brew! Grr

Throwing money at a problem usually isn't the right way to fix it... This is an interesting revelation for me.

I've been working on filling up our calendar with fun -- March's theme is building in more fun and we've started early. Planning and then looking forward to events makes my days brighter.

I often get caught up in the FB updates of friends and comparing my life to theirs. This is like reality t.v.; it's a waste of time and does nothing to improve my own life. Today I will focus on taking action to improve my own happiness.

Time to face the money issue...it has been weighing me down.

The happiness and reward of making small gestures towards others is starting to come back to me. It feels like the focus on my lens is getting a tiny bit wider... my world is getting a tiny bit bigger...I'm going to roll with the momentum.

Today I'm looking forward to four glorious hours of ME TIME!

Today is my annual physical...no coffee until after 10 a.m. Torture! However, I'm grateful for this body of mine so I'll follow the doc's orders.

Today, I'm excited to accept an invite to a b-day party - it will help me get to know other mothers in my son's day care. I'm also calling the babysitter to set up some "me time." I hate paying for time off, but my sanity is worth it.

I connected with other women this morning and it reminded me how much I crave and need more of these connections. There is no perfect time and no perfect me. I need to find ways to make this happen more.

"How to Talk So Kids will Listen, and How to Listen so Kids Will Talk" by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish: Gretchen is right, this book is fantastic! I'm learning to listen more, nag less, and offer choices. It will take time, but it's worth it!

It would have been easy to be lazy. However, I got the whole family up and out @ 7:30 a.m. to witness a rare high rise building implosion. To see it, and to be part of the masses that showed up to watch it, felt like I was truly participating in life

I bought some pretty stationary and plan to send some long overdue hand written notes. Connecting with people is a very large goal this year. By nurturing existing relationships, I will learn how to build new ones.

10 PM bedtime...stick with it! Bad things happen after 10 PM: unnecessary glass(es) of wine, unnecessary eating, and bad tv! The result? Less "gold stars" on my resolution chart, a blown diet, and one tired, cranky, disappointed lady. Hmmph!

I had an in-office procedure done today and as I whined about how much the numbing needles hurt, I realized that I have friends with life threatening illnesses who would trade places with me in an instant. I shut up.

I'm renewing my gym membership. It occurred to me that for the price of three fancy yoga classes I can go to the gym for an entire month; which, by the way, has yoga included!

The Bikram yoga instructor said "If you skip through some of the steps in your postures it means you don't accept where you are today. Same in your life. Accept where you are now and move on from it." I like that. This is where I am today.

Loved this post on the inspiration board: "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." Dr. Seuss

I just realized, this very moment, that a major source of my unhappiness comes from my need to please others. How sad (but also freeing) to know many of my friendships and experiences have been out of obligation, not out of choice. This will change.